Earlier this week I wrote a post about whether being working mom was worth the trade offs. It would only be fair to show the other side of that question. So I asked my sister, Michelle Ruddy Calderero, what some mother, challenges stay at home moms struggle with.
She said that by being a stay at home mom, you are expected to run the household to perfection. Your house must be clean and orderly at all times or you are met with a “What did you do all day?” from the bread winner.
She added for the stay at home mom there are no sick days and no days off. Since most of the people in your house think since you are home everyday you don’t need a “day off.” You never really get a true “day off.”
You are the household cater. Sahm are expected to plan all meals and make sure everyone is feed a wholesome home cooked meal, not short cuts.
Michelle also stated to me that all doctor& dentist appointments for the family, homework, laundry and taxi service are sole the reasonability of the Stay at home mom. She must handle the schedule and appointment setting of everyone in the household.
She added that there is a silent reasonability of the stay at home mom to handle the ball of stress that their spouse becomes whenever there is a finaical issue on the horizon. With that there is a certain amount of guilt for not bringing an income into the house and a feeling that what they provide by managing the household is not equal.
A final point she stated was that society in general did not value the time of a stay at home mother the way they do someone that works outside the home. SAHM are thought to have an abundance of time when that couldn’t be further from the truth.
There is a definite pressure to maintain an immaculate home, be PTA mom and have a home cooked dinner on the table. Stay at home moms might not be bringing in a monetary income but they are running a household and raising children which is not a job you really get to go home from.
Just want to add a thank you to my sister and all the commenters who shared their perspective on this topic. What I have learned was that whater you choice it has to be the right choice for you and your family. There are goods and bads to each situation, nothing is perfect. Lastly, I learned I need to not take for granted the ability and gift I have been given to be able to handle being a working mom. I have to appreciate and be more thankful for what I have instead of looking at what I don’t.