I’m about a week into my 21 day fix program and I think I finally get it. it’s all about portion control. I have done a lot of reading about what to eat, food additives, GMO’s and such. I know veggies and fruits are better for you. I know that homemade is better than store-bought. I have followed the no processed food axiom. I stay away from chemicals. I get all of that. My problem…well I eat to much. The secret to moderation, to much of anything is not a good thing. Even fruits and vegetables.
I just assumed because I was eating healthy that I could eat more. Even thought I was eating healthier lower calorie foods, I was compensating for my deprivation by eating more of them. Then add on top of that the emotional eating (we’re I’m eating bad stuff almost to compulsion to deal with stress.) That’s a recipe for disaster. No wonder I felt so out of control because well…I was out of control.
My portion size was way to big for the frequency I was eating. I have not so much conquered the stress/emotional eating part of this equation. I need to dig a bit deeper for that, but this was a huge break thru. I know for a long time, I was just going along using food to comfort. Never facing the reality of what I was doing. I hide it, made it my dirty secret.
Deciding to do this and record my feelings here on this blog has made me accountable. It has made me face my dirty little secret of overeating. It has made me face the shame I feel. On the outside I was healthy but mysteriously could never lose any weight. On the outside I eat veggies and exercised, but behind closed doors, when the kids are fighting and the dog needs to go out and I haven’t had a moment of peace. I would eat. Having regimented amount in such a specific way has helped me recognize this about my eating habits. It has brought these issues front and center for me because to give in to the emotional eating would be to blow this whole program. I’m not willing to do that, not anymore.
I still have much to figure out about my emotional eating. Where it is coming from and how to correct the behavior. I also need to think how I will make these new habits stick after the 21 days. I have a lot of work to do, but this is a start. Thanks for following along in my search for dietary moderation.